


hedonism

by gadzoots



Category: Critical Role (Web Series) RPF
Genre: Collars, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-28
Updated: 2019-05-28
Packaged: 2020-03-26 12:25:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19005751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gadzoots/pseuds/gadzoots
Summary: Liam likes these quiet moments the most.





	hedonism

**Author's Note:**

> Don't be weird and share this with people who don't need to see it.

Liam likes these quiet moments the most. They’re rare to find, especially these days, when he finds that most of his time is spent laughing hysterically, thinking of all the people watching them play their dumb Dungeons & Dragons game and do silly voices. He still remembers the first time they sold out an order of t-shirts. Or got one hundred subscribers on Twitch. If he could talk to that past Liam, he’d probably tell him to buckle up, kid, it was gonna get wilder.

You think they’d all be sick of each other now, and sure, there are times when he wants to crawl under his blankets in a dark room, or maybe invest in a sensory deprivation tank, but there are also moments like these, when he has to lean his full weight into the nearest person available, just feel their quiet presence, not have to talk at all.

That happens to be Sam right now, but Travis is sitting on his other side on the couch, his arm stretched across the back so that every time he shifts, Liam can feel him brush against him. He’s lost track of what’s going on, some video game that Matt put on while they all talk over it.

They’re all over at Matt and Marisha’s house. It was meant to be a chill hang-out where they maybe discussed logistics of the Kickstarter, but honestly they were all so burned out that it’s just become an excuse now to unwind and drink some of the expensive wine that Sam brought over. They haven’t brought up the show once at all, and it’s kind of nice.

Liam doesn’t quite remember what prompts Matt to bring the collar out. Things get fuzzy around that, like they usually do. Travis’s face definitely lights up, his entire body language changing to where he’s basically bouncing up in his seat, the same energy as when Matt had Artagan choke Vax out — Travis is easy to delight when it means Liam is getting his buttons pushed.

“Figured you might need it,” Matt says, holding it in his hands like it’s something priceless, even though it’s pretty basic as these things go, leather with a small metal ring in the front. Well-worn and comfortable. Meant for special occasions. Here among his friends, his second family, wanting more than anything to calm the fuck down, it’s a no-brainer.

He doesn’t give an answer, just tilts his head without breaking eye contact, baring his neck, and everyone watches as Matt puts the collar on him. It’s a specific kind of anointing that only Matt is allowed to do. That’s how it all started — Matt kind of suggesting it off hand when Liam told him how fucking unbearable it was to be alone with his thoughts sometimes. Liam’s face when Matt said it must have been something truly special, going by Matt’s reaction, which was to lean forward in his seat in consternation and check if he was okay. 

More than okay.  _ This _ is more than okay — the collar around his neck, everyone just letting him  _ exist  _ like this, guiding him when he needs to be guided, touching him a little more than usual. Travis, especially, seems to have a fascination for the collar, keeps running his fingers along it and playing with the edges of it, gives the ring an experimental tug, and then grins slow and wide when Liam can’t help whining, tilting his head all the way up, letting the pressure dig a little into his throat.

“Yeah, you look good like this,” Travis says, kind of reverently, and the words sink like stones into him. Liam wants — god, Liam wants so much all the time, and he knows it’s never fair to ask that much, but this is almost it, Travis pulling him in with the finger still hooked into his collar to kiss him, his beard rubbing the sides of his face raw. 

Sam stays beside him on the couch, and even though he’s busy talking to Marisha across the room, Liam gets the sense that Sam’s still keeping an eye on him. Sam knows more than anyone how — intense things can get, because Liam’s brain likes to do that thing where it abruptly pulls all the safeguards out of the equation and goes into a full feedback loop. It’s easy for him to get overwhelmed. 

Sam drove him here, and when the evening is done, Sam will drive him home. That’s always the hardest part of it, coming out on the other end. Sam’s good at giving white noise and terrible jokes as a distraction. He’s also good at making sure Liam’s safe, has kind of a preternatural sense for it, actually, which scares Liam a little. He’s never going to be able to lie to Sam, not really. 

Sam rubs a hand across Liam’s shoulders even as Travis keeps playing around with that fucking ring, keeps tilting Liam’s head back to worry at the sensitive part of his jaw right underneath his ear with his teeth. Liam’s probably making a whole lot of embarrassing noises right now, would probably care more if he could really remember where his body is in all this sensation. Liam O’Brien? Don’t know him.

Laura, when she comes over, is definitely a little tipsy. “Hey, stop  _ hogging  _ him,” she says to Travis, swatting Travis’s hands away from where they’re curled around Liam’s thigh, around his neck. “I’m taking him now.” And she drags Liam off the couch by the collar, careful not to put too much pressure, but still an inexorable pull that gets him to his feet, the world spinning a little dizzily for a moment. 

She leads him away, just like that, and god, what it does to Liam to be treated like something to be shared between them. He loves that about them — that they aren’t ever careful or guarded around him. Travis and Laura both like to push him, just a little, and he’s completely fine with that. How could he not be?

Liam doesn’t even realize for a moment that he’s being led to the kitchen, all of his concentration on not tripping on his own feet, hunching down so that Laura can pull him along behind her. The difference in height is a little dangerous here, and Laura doesn’t seem to be concerned with making it particularly easy for him.

Matt’s in the kitchen already, busy opening take-out containers of food and putting them in dishes. None of them have  _ time  _ to cook, but Matt is still fastidious about not eating food straight out of take-out containers. He likes to make a presentation out of it, even if it is just lo mein and egg rolls.

“Here he is,” Laura announces, finally releasing him, and Liam wonders if Matt asked her to go, like, fetch him or something. She doesn’t leave, though, goes over to the counter to pour herself another glass of wine.

Matt’s eyes, when he sees Liam, go soft and attentive, and Liam always feels a little helpless under that much attention. During their games, Matt’s paying attention to about three hundred things at once, plus the other three hundred things that they don’t even  _ know _ about yet. It’s simultaneously heady and absolutely crushing to have all of that on you in the moment.

“Hey buddy,” Matt says. “You doing all right?”

Liam can’t answer, just goes forward, and nuzzles a bit into Matt’s shoulder until Matt laughs a little and hugs him back. “Thanks,” Liam mumbles. “You’re so fucking good at this, you know?”

“Okay,” Matt says, in that evasive way he always has whenever someone tries to compliment him. “But you know that wasn’t an answer, right? Gonna need a yes or a no.”

“Mmm,” Liam hums. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m all right.”

Matt smiles down at him. “Good. Help me with this?” he says, and Liam nods, and goes to stand where Matt tells him to stand, and helps him put everything together.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [get it (just right)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19790401) by [breathtaken](https://archiveofourown.org/users/breathtaken/pseuds/breathtaken)




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